Yoga as a Relationship

A few days ago, we finished another 200-hour Teacher Training here in Japan.

As always, the final hugs were bittersweet. Three weeks of shared practice, conversations, good food, laughter, moments of frustration, and countless cups of tea suddenly came to an end.

When I looked back over the course, I realised that one idea kept appearing in almost every conversation we had.

Yoga is a relationship.

Not just a relationship with our body.

A relationship with everything.

If you were like me, you first came to yoga because you wanted something.

A stronger body.

Less pain.

More flexibility.

Less stress.

And that's perfectly okay. But somewhere along the journey, the questions begin to change.

Instead of asking, "Can I touch my toes?" we begin asking, "How am I treating my body?"

Instead of wondering whether we're breathing correctly, we begin wondering whether we're actually breathing, whether we are actually listening.

The posture hasn't changed. The relationship has.

Over the three weeks, we spoke about relationships in many different ways.

Our relationship with movement.

Our relationship with discomfort.

Our relationship with food.

Our relationship with rest.

Our relationship with ambition.

Our relationship with failure.

Our relationship with uncertainty.

Even our relationship with silence.

It's amazing how often the challenge isn't the pose itself. It's the story we bring into it.

One student once asked me, "What is the correct alignment? It's a great question and maybe another question is equally important.

"How am I relating to this moment?"

Am I forcing?

Am I avoiding?

Am I competing?

Am I listening?

Those answers tell me far more than whether my front knee is directly above my ankle.

I think this is why yoga continues to fascinate me after all these years.

There is always another relationship waiting to be explored.

The relationship with our partner.

With our children.

With our work.

With ageing.

With success.

With disappointment.

With ourselves.

The mat simply becomes a place to rehearse for life.

By the end of the training, I don't think anyone had become a "perfect yogi."

Thankfully.

Instead, I think we all became a little more aware of how we relate. And perhaps that's enough. Because yoga isn't asking us to become someone else. It's inviting us into a better relationship with the person we already are.

Maybe that is yoga.